The Truth About the Boomers Divorce Epidemic

By Gary Geyer.

According to The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, the Associated Press, and CBS News, those of us past 50 are lining up to divorce.

Enough is enough

The New York Times story was called “The 37 Year Itch”; The Wall Street Journal went as far as calling it a “boom”. The Associated Press called it a “growing legion” of older Americans untying the knot; and CBS News described the “growing trend of 50, 60, and 70-something year olds who are divorcing after decades of marriage”.

Oh my!

The articles says that divorce is more widely accepted and no longer reserved for those 40-somethings have a mid-life crisis. There is even a name for it – “gray divorcees”.

Reasons for the so-called “epidemic” are many, the articles conclude. They cite:

• The increased longevity of Americans – the logic being that people 65 think they have 25 years left and why should they settle?
• The growing economic independence in women.
• The boomer generation’s tradition of self-examination and self expression.
• Good health thanks to cholesterol and blood pressure lowering drugs.
• Drugs that eliminate or lessen depression.
• Stimulated libido (Viagra for men and controversial – and perhaps unsafe – hormone replacement therapy for women).

There is only one major problem and it’s a big one.

There is no credible evidence that there is a divorce boom in progress. Much of the stories are built on hearsay and interviews with a few lawyers and marriage counselors. The case they site are purely anecdotal. In fact, statistics suggest that divorce rates among those over 50 have remained stable and at low levels compared to the rest of the population.

Here’s how mis-information gets started.

The recent census does in fact show that a record high of 2.5 million seniors reported that their marital status was “divorced”. That sounds like the proof we are looking for, doesn’t it?

Well, its not the case. Those statistics include anyone who was divorced forty, or thirty or twenty or ten years ago and never remarried.
What the statistics do show is that more divorced adults are aging and entering the older American age group.

So, if you want to arrive at an accurate answer as to what the divorce rate actually is of the senior age group, you have to take each year separately and find out for every 1000 married persons (say 65 and older), how many got divorced.

Here are some numbers.

For men in 1970, that figure was 1.9. In 1980, that figure was still 1.9. In 1990, it was 2.1.
For women in 1970, the figure was 1.3. In 1980, it was 1.4. In 1990, it was still 1.4. Not exactly a trend and nowhere near a boom or an epidemic brewing.

What has happened since then is somewhat of a mystery. In 1996, the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS) stopped collecting divorce data. However, the Censor Bureau’s evidence strongly suggests that divorce rates among seniors have remained relatively stable.

The Bottom Line

It’s not always an easy time. Retirement, empty nests and those darn hormones. All couples hit some bumps in the road. Bumps don’t mean divorce. Remember more divorced adults are becoming seniors, rather than more married seniors are suddenly splitting.

However, if you are thinking of divorce, consider the following

• Review and update the beneficiaries of wills, life insurance, retirement, trusts, powers of attorney and other important legal documents to be sure the proper people are assigned to carry out your wishes.
• If you are a grandparent, you want to make sure visitation rights are made perfectly clear since in all likelihood you will not be visiting, or have your grandchild’s visits at the same time as your ex-spouse.

If a divorce occurs because a spouse has become incompetent, the court might have to appoint a guardian or other professional to assist an attorney and the court in the process.