By Gary Geyer
Everyone has an idea of what they consider good and bad sex. The common complaints men have about women over 50 are: lack of enthusiasm, no creativity, and poor technique.
Boring sex isn’t the same thing as bad sex, although it can be. Boring sex is always doing it in the same place, at the same time, and in the same old position. It’s as if when some women who are over 50 get to the point that it feels like they’re doing it more as a duty than because they really want to. They go through the motions but with no fun or passion.
Men say they are as horny as ever
Many men over 50 say that they have reached the time of our life that they never thought they’d get to. Much to their surprise, they are as horny as they ever were.
When they were in their twenties they were easily satisfied and had few complaints about sex. If the deed was done, that was good enough for them. Now that they’ve reached their middle to late years, somewhere between boomer and senior, they have a few complaints they’d like to air.
So without further adieu, here are 11 complaints the men interviewed had (in no particular order) when they are having sex with a mature woman, a woman older than 50.
1. She is sexually ignorant.
“It’s amazing to me that some women, having reached this point in their lives but still have no idea how their bodies work, (and show no interest in finding out) let alone how my body works.”
2. She won’t tell me what she wants in bed.
“Women think I’m a mind reader. They should know better by now. If you didn’t get off, say something; If you want me to try something new, speak up! If you are not in the mood, for Pete’s sake, let me know! God gave you a mouth, use it! (Okay, I know what you’re thinking but that’s not what I meant.)”
3. She’s too self-conscious about her body.
“If a woman is worrying about how she looks the whole time, how can she get into what she’s doing?” You don’t know what the guy is thinking. You may think you’re fat, he could be thinking voluptuous. If you’re feeling self- conscious, lower the lights and light some candles.
[In a recent survey, women with a positive body image said they had orgasms 73 percent of the time. Self-conscious women reached orgasm only 42 percent of the time.]
4. She won’t talk dirty.
“I know, many women think they’ll sound stupid or worse, not lady-like. Lighten up, I say. You don’t have to yell at the top of your lungs, you can whisper dirty to me. It’s sexier that way, anyway.”
5. She doesn’t wear lingerie anymore.
“I’m sure some women are thinking, men are living in a fantasy world. So, what’s your point? Sex is the perfect time to be living in fantasy world. I’m mot talking every night, but how about once in a while? Trust me, during the day, when a man who is over 50 is fantasizing, and we still do, we are not thinking of you in a thick woolen nightie. We’ve gotten older, but we’re still breathing.”
6. She only likes one position.
“It seems as she got older, she started liking the missionary position almost exclusively. It gets a little repetitious and takes some of the fun out of it.”
7. She won’t do oral sex.
“She did it when we were younger, before we were married. I’ll settle for once in a while–even if it’s just for a few minutes.”
8. She won’t initiate.
“We get it – you like to be pursued. But guys need to feel that way too. Instead of ‘Me Tarzan, you Jane,’ try thinking ‘Me Jane, you Tarzan’ for a change.”
9. She worries too much about the kids hearing us.
“Hey, you know what year this is? Kids are much more savvy these days. Maybe they’ll see us in a whole new light. You know, Cool. I’ll put a lock on the bedroom door if you think it will help.”
10. She let herself go
“She doesn’t seem to want to be sexy like she was years ago when we started dating. Yes, I find her cute in her sweat pants with no make-up… but all those creams and goop at night… I want her to be sexy for me.”
11. She Screams
“It’s the screaming! I get a little embarrassed. Does the whole neighborhood have to know that something is going on in our kitchen?”
Gary Geyer is Chief Editor of “Let Life In.”